Saturday 30 July 2011

To Square To Be HIP!



London has many membership bars all vying for the creme de la creme of the London Social Scene. I have been in several and my partner always thinks they are just a loads of bollocks as he says and never undersands the pretension of people paying money to be accepted. He has a point. Membership bars are not that hard to get into if you know the right people and the always seem to be the friends of friends that make the place cooler or dare i say it Hip. Bren told me i was an idiot if I paid for a membership to on of the bars which I seriously considered and had my name put forward by a friend. The places always seek the "creative types" but the seem to atract the pesky bullshit monkey suit with a bank account bigger than his dick. To me most of them are not "creatives and or artists" They're sales people who claim marketing is an art form not a pitch.

I've been to both Shoreditch House once when Amy was dj'ing had breakfast there with a client and watched a few celebrities get into drunken arguments with their dates in Soho House and Sketch. But I would never call these places cool. So It struck me funny when a suit took offence to his ass being barred by both clubs and sister watering holes for being told not to wear a suit. Ladies and gentlemen i give you ehibit A. Pudgy old fart whom conducts business at these places and took offence when he was 86'd for wearing his working clothes to the establishments. He was told he was to School for cool.

I know you shouldn't judge a book by it's cover but I am going to say this fucker looks like he wouldn't be exactly cracking don P's at P Diddy's crib chillin any time soon. One lesson in cool if you paid to belong your not cool. They bar is celebrating your money as you are as well. Cool people just don't expect to pay for frivolious things like a £600 memebrship There are bars that will just hand you one if they like you or know you. What i find even more funny is this jerk went to the press to moan about it. No sympathy here. He used his money as a battery ram and felt that validated him as belonging, HIs walking papers were the official NO. A friend of mine had a dream once where she didn't make it passed the velvet rope, and she was told in her dream she wasn't cool enough and it upset her. Ok we were 24 and she just moved to LA. There are social graces those in the know must obtain to survive in the ever changing battle ground rules of perpetual cool. To quote Groacho Marx, I would beve want to belong to a club that would have me as a member.

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