Sunday, 5 April 2009
Who Would Kicks Who's Ass?
In this corner weighing in at a staggering 270 pounds (19 1/2 stone) at 5'10 in flannel and timberland boots, driving a Range Rover Sport(spurt). Ladies and gentlemen I give you Barry. To my right in the D&G jeans and cropped pink t weighing in at 138 pounds (9 stone) and equipped with enough bad credit and debt, I give you Jules.
In n all great battles there are numerous things to consider before placing bets on whom can kick who's ass. Thier are the issues of size, hight, stamina, physical prowess etc. etc. Now we have to types of people Bears and Twinks. Both have assigned bars and both have a attire and looks that is immediately identifiable. It's fair to say that some twinks will loose thier hair and grow guts and their levels of testosterone will kick in and once they hit their 30's may suddenly look like bears. As mush as it is to say that some bears fancy twinks, as easily as they do a bucket of fried chicken. Fuck yeah the pun was intended. Now I have read that a new trend of Guerrilla Gay/Bear Bar crashing. A social network passed online that informs it's members to take over a bar for a night that Gays themselves wouldn't normally go into. Oh you know like, biker bars, strip clubs, sleazy joints complete with Oriental whores whom turn tricks in the back alley( a fave of mine). No these guys go to other gay bars where their less likely to be assulted. Kinda like going to Gay Dinseyland and having to be sly about taking your drugs there as well. There is no real threat, no sense of danger or even adventure. Why because you know what type of rides are their... Pretty much same shit different park. To me it sounds like your typical suburban bullshit that some guys think is cutting edge. I pass!
I was in Cuff's in Silver Lake years ago and talked to a guy whom was obviously from West Hollywood. He said, 'We Ho guys go to Silver Lake when they want to find a Top. Made sense to me, and I lived in Silver Lake and rarely went to We Ho. Well here
we have two guys: Both drink, suck dick and both would stick their mugs in an ass crack if they saw fit.
Exhibit A: Dress Sense.
Bears: wear the bear uniform. T-shirt and jeans sometimes that lame flannel shirt with the sleeves cut off. Buckskin boots or leather boots. Don't wear cologne or perfumes. Attempt to listen to a broader range of music may like classical.
Twinks: Where pretty much anything that makes them appear current fashionable and supposedly trendy. Shiny fabrics, T-shirts diamontes on them. Like to think their lives are one big Sex And The City Episode. Reak of Designer/Imposter Perfume shit! Love Madonna, Kylie and shit that any 9 year old wets their pant for.
Exhibit B: Drink and???
Bears: Bears drink beer.... hence the bear bear gut. Some suprisingly have six pack abs and actually eat. Some are all roided up and take drugs socially. No I have to say that London's gay scene can be pretty flexiable on the issue of Stimulants. Fine by me. Some bears just stick to beer and or whiskey. Most bears are a little less body consciouss than twinks and are slightly more confident so you will see one or two rude drunks as a whole not many.
Twinks: Drink Cocktails, some drink beer to many carbs tho. The sad thing is that at sometime you will run into a snooty rude drunk normally around 23 complete with the gay gasp and just a shit stain on the underwear of life when drunk! Mostly due from insecurity. Most can be pretty light weight line per line matched with the expierience of a bear in that department.
Exhibit C: Fight
Bears: Most really are not aggresive or even mean, but the size of some can be quite imposing. Because these dudes sweat, most twinks may not like the idea of a hairy sweaty torso in front of their grill! Unless a really fat one just sat on a twink!
Twinks: Of course the twink can just spritz the bear in the eyes with his cologne and sucker punch the dude in the cock.
Or just the shrill pitch of his voice when screaming would be enough for a bear to recoil in fright. Nature gives every creature a source of defence.
But thinking of this, the twink would probably be a power bottom and the bear would fall in response to be called Daddy and love till he pumped and dumped. Then it would be over. I do know that most bears tend to keep to their own and some twinks actually fancy the shit out of bears Yet if it had to be a bar brawl, Hmm I woulld place my noeny on the bear. but you know that little pissy bitch would go down swinging. Perhaps its just what ever makes your johnson stand at attention. Yet, with all those sparkles and cologne could prove to distracting for any real action to take place. But if i had to choose... ok I'll say it bear! When I met my partner I was seeing someone whom was 24. To him we were hanging out. To me at 34 we were fucking and occasionaly hanging out. But my partner is no bear cause I don't affiliate myself as one.. Just a big Irish dude..and I like that! Yeah!